What makes a good parent?
A great parent is a person who strives to make decisions in the best interest of the kid.
What makes a fantastic parent isn't just defined by the parent 's actions, but additionally their intention.
A great parent doesn't have to be ideal. No one is perfect. No kid is perfect either … keeping this in mind is essential when we set our expectations.
Profitable parenting is not about achieving perfection. But it does not mean that we should not work to that goal. Set high standards for ourselves then and first our children second. We function as important role models for them.
Top 10 Parenting Tips
You'll be a much better parent, in case you follow these 10 strategies for parenting tips, and you'll avoid bad parenting.
Not all of them tend to be that simple.
Not everybody is able to do them constantly.
Although some of these may not be 100 % successful, you will be able to move forward using the tips in this parenting guide.
#1 BE An excellent Role MODEL
Walk the walk. Do not simply tell the child of yours everything you wish them to do.
The most effective way to teach is showing them.
Human is a special species in part because we can learn by imitation. We are programmed to copy others' actions, understand them, and integrate them in to our personal. Children, particularly, watch everything the parents of theirs do very thoroughly.
So, be the person you would like the child of yours to be - respect your kid, demonstrate to them positive behavior and attitude, have empathy towards your child's emotion - and your child will follow suit.
#2: Love THEM And Show Through ACTION
Demonstrate the love of yours.
There is simply no such thing as loving the child of yours a lot of. To love them can't spoil them.
Only what you choose to do (or give) in the title of love can - things as material indulgence, leniency, low expectation, and over-protection. When these things are provided in place of real love, that's when you will have a spoiled kid.
To love the child of yours may be as simple as giving them hugs, spending quality time with them, having family meals together, and listening to your kid's problems seriously.
Showing these acts of love can trigger the release of feel-good hormones such as oxytocin. These neurochemicals are able to provide us a deep sense of contentment, emotional warmth, and calm; from these, the kid, will develop resilience and also never to mention a closer relationship with you.
#3: Practice Kind And Firm POSITIVE PARENTING
Infants are born with around hundred billion brain cells (neurons) with comparatively few connections. These connections create our thoughts, drive the actions of ours, shape the personalities of ours, and basically determine who we're. They are "sculpted", strengthened, and created through life experiences.
Give the child of yours positive family interaction, especially in the early years. They will then be equipped to see positive experiences themselves and offer them to others.
But if you give the child of yours bad experiences, they will not have the development type necessary for them to thrive.
Sing that silly song. Use a tickle marathon. Go to the park. Laugh with your child. Give them positive attention. Ride through an emotional tantrum with them. Solve a problem together with a positive attitude.
These positive experiences create good neural connections in your child's brain and form the memories of you that your child carries for life.
When it comes to discipline, it seems hard to remain positive, especially when dealing with behavior problems. But it is possible by using positive discipline and avoiding harsh discipline.
Being a great parent means you have to teach the child of yours the morals of what's right and what's wrong.
Setting limits and being constant is the golden rule to good discipline. Be firm and kind whenever you set rules and enforce them. Focus on the reason behind the child's misbehavior. And make it an opportunity for them to find out for the future in a good way, rather than to get penalized for the past.
#4: Be a Safe HAVEN FOR The CHILD of yours
Let your child realize that you will always be there for them if it is responsive to your child's signals and vulnerable to the needs of theirs. Support and accept the child of yours as an individual. Be a warm and safe place for the child of yours to explore from and go back to.
Children raised by parents who are consistently responsive have much better emotional regulation development, social skills development, and emotional health outcomes.
#5: Talk with The CHILD of yours And Help THEIR BRAINS INTEGRATE
Many of us already know the importance of communication. Talk to your child and also listen to them thoroughly. By maintaining an open line of communication, you will have a much better connection with your child and your child will come to you when there's a problem.
But there's an additional reason behind communication. You help your kid integrate various parts of the brain of theirs, a crucial process in a kid's development.
Integration is akin to the body of ours, in which various organs should coordinate and work in concert to have a trully healthy body. When various regions of the brain are incorporated, they are able to work harmoniously as an entire, meaning less tantrums, much more good behavior, much more empathy, and much better psychological well-being.
To do that, talk through troubling experiences. Ask your child to describe what happened and how they felt to develop attuned communication.
You don't need to offer solutions. You do not have to have all of the answers to be a good parent. Just listening to them talk. Ask clarifying questions using words that are simple are going to help them make sense of the experiences of theirs and integrate the memories of theirs.
#6: Reflect on Your own personal CHILDHOOD
A lot of us want to parent differently from our parents. Even those who had an excellent upbringing and a thankful childhood may want to change several elements of how they were brought up.
But really frequently, when we open the mouths of ours, we speak just like our own parents did.
Reflecting on the own childhood of ours is an action towards understanding why we parent the way we do. Make note of things you would like changing and think of how you'd get it done differently in a genuine scenario. Try to be aware and change the behavior of yours the next time those issues come up.
Don't quit if you don't succeed in the beginning. It takes practice, lots of practice to consciously alter one 's child-rearing methods.
#7: Pay attention to Your personal WELL-BEING
Parents need relief too.
Give consideration to your own well-being to avoid parental burnout.
Oftentimes, things including your own needs or maybe the health of your marriage are placed on the back burner when a child is born. When you don't pay attention to them, they are going to become bigger problems down the road. Make time to strengthen your relationship with the spouse of yours.
Stressed-out parents are more vulnerable to fighting. Do not be afraid to request parenting help. To have some "me time" for self-care and stress management is crucial to rejuvenate the brain.
How parents take care of their child mentally and physically will make an impact in the parenting of theirs and family life. If these two areas fail, the child of yours is going to suffer, too.
#8: Don't SPANK, NO MATTER WHAT
Undoubtedly, to some parents, spanking is able to bring about short term compliance which occasionally is a much-needed help for the parents.
However, this method does not teach the kid right from wrong. It only teaches the kid to fear external consequences. The child will be motivated to avoid getting caught with behavior that is inappropriate.
Spanking your child is modeling to the child that he/she can resolve issues by violence. A child who's spanked, smacked, or hit is much more vulnerable to fighting with other children. They're more apt in order to become bullies and to use verbal/physical aggression to resolve disputes.
Later in life, they're also more apt to result in oppositional behavior and delinquency, worse parent-child human relationships, mental health issues, and domestic violence victims or even abusers.
You will find a variety of better alternatives to discipline which have been shown to be more effective, such as positive discipline (Tip #3 above positive reinforcement and).
#9: Keep Things In Perspective And remember YOUR PARENTING GOAL
What's your goal in raising a child?
When you are like the majority of parents, you would like your child to do well in school, be productive, be independent and responsible, be respectful, enjoy good associations with you and others, be caring and compassionate, and have a happy, healthy and fulfilling life.
But just how much time do you spend working towards those goals?
When you are like most parents, you probably spend most of the time just trying to get through the day. As authors, Siegel and Bryson, point out in their book, The Whole-Brain child, instead of helping your child thrive, you spend most of time just trying to survive!
To not let the survival mode dominate your life, next time you feel angry or frustrated, step back. Think about what anger and frustration will do for you or your child.
Instead, look for ways to switch each bad experience right into a learning opportunity for them. Even epic tantrums could be transformed into priceless brain sculpting moments in case you concentrate on teaching the child of yours, not attempting to control them.
#10: Take a SHORTCUT Through the use of Findings In Latest PSYCHOLOGY And NEUROSCIENCE RESEARCH
By shortcuts, I do not mean shortchanging the child of yours with tricks. What I mean is taking advantage of what's currently known by scientists.
To parent is one of the most researched fields in psychology. Many parenting techniques, traditions, or practices were scientifically researched, refined, verified, or refuted.
For optimum parenting advice for raising a child and info which are backed by science, here is among my personal favorite science based parenting books, The Science of Parenting.
Making use of medical knowledge is of course not a one-size-fits-all strategy. Every kid differs. Even within the very best parenting style, there are able to be many different effective parenting practices you could choose based on your child's temperament.
A good example is employing spanking to discipline. You will find many better alternatives, e.g. redirection, reasoning, time-in, etc. You are able to choose a non punitive discipline method that works ideal for the child of yours.
Of course, you are able to also choose to utilize "traditional" or maybe "old school" parenting styles (e.g. punishing or spanking) and might still buy a "similar" outcome.
Differential susceptibility has shown us that children with various temperaments react to the quality of parenting differently.
Those people who are more susceptible to parenting quality will have much better outcomes under good parenting but even worse outcomes under bad parenting.
Those people who are less susceptible may "turn out fine" regardless of how tough their parents treat them. Though it doesn't imply those practices are good. These children are merely lucky. They could thrive despite bad parenting, not due to it.
Why take a chance with sub par parenting practices when you can use well-researched, better ones?
The importance of parenting can't be underestimated. Taking science-based parental advice might not be https://parentinghowto.com/ the easiest way to parent. It might require more work on the part of yours in the short term but can save you lots of agony and time in the long term.
Final Thoughts On Parenting
The good point is, that although parenting is hard, it's also really rewarding. The bad part is the rewards typically come much later than the hard work. But in case we try our best now, we'll ultimately reap the rewards and have absolutely nothing to regret.
To Happy Parenting!